Dwelling on certain actions you’ve taken that you aren’t proud of? Remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes. You might feel like you don’t deserve to be around your friends or family. Or you might feel like no one even wants to be around you.
- If you’re not already in contact with a treatment service, now could be a good time to speak to one.
- Before you know it, just looking at yourself in the mirror can trigger thoughts of self-hatred and frustration.
If You Need to Change, Change
This is all good and well, but how does a person reach a space of self-love while in the pits of self-hatred? Even the desire to build self-love is one rung up from pure self-hatred. Blame or not, when someone is seeking healing from any number of problems, the existence of self-hatred (or its arch-enemy self-compassion) makes a huge impact on recovery. Many are ashamed even of having self-hatred. Our self-esteem is not a reflection of our true worth as a person.
Three Strategies
She has a Master’s degree in clinical psychology. As you journal each day, look for patterns and aim to become more aware of how your emotions shift. Research shows that expressive writing such as journaling can help to reduce psychological distress. If you are having suicidal thoughts or thoughts of self harm, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 for support and assistance from a trained counselor.
Mental Health Awards
- Breaking free from habits that trigger relapse requires going beyond willpower or abstinence.
- The National Alliance on Mental Illness can also help you find a group in your area.
- If you are struggling to find where to start on your self-love journey here are three strategies to do so.
- If you’re already seeing a treatment service, then telling your recovery worker about your lapse helps them support you better.
If you live in the U.S., head over to the American Psychological Association’s therapist locator. Consider talking to others dealing with similar issues online. The Anxiety and Depression Association of America has an online support group for people dealing with a range of issues. The National Alliance on Mental Illness can also help you find a group in your area. The next time you feel like saying, “I hate myself,” try to think of a small way you can reframe that statement to be more manageable and specific. But you’re taking an all-or-nothing statement and reframing it as a single instance.
Negative Inner Critic
- Simply challenging these negative thoughts helps to reinforce the idea that self-hatred isn’t a fact or undeniable truth — it’s an emotion.
- In fact, many people have multiple setbacks before finally achieving a full recovery.
- This is all good and well, but how does a person reach a space of self-love while in the pits of self-hatred?
- Yet, capturing some sense of loyalty to oneself is often critical for recovery.
- Below are some possible causes to consider.
If you are looking to get over self-hatred, there are a number of things you can do to break the cycle. Above all else, remember that you are not to blame for how you feel, but you are responsible from this day forward for the actions that you take toward making positive changes. The more that your condition influences your thoughts, the more likely it is that you will start to see this negative view of yourself as your reality. This can leave you feeling as though you are not worthy Sobriety and do not belong.
When You Almost Relapse Into Self-Harm
If you can’t bring yourself to meet in person, make a phone call or send an email or text. The important part is to reestablish contact and let them know you’re struggling. A relapse (“lapse,” “slip,” “setback”) is one of the most frustrating, humiliating experiences you can face in recovery from any problem habit. It leaves you feeling guilty, ashamed and tempted to throw in the towel and just keep acting out on the addiction.
Yet, what makes the difference is how we see ourselves. We need to create an open dialog when it comes to self-harm as an addiction, because I know I’m not the only one afraid of what others will think when this is shared. As someone who’s attempted suicide twice and been affected by multiple suicide losses within my own family, I understand what it takes to persist. By Arlin Cuncic, MAArlin Cuncic, MA, is the author of The Anxiety Workbook and founder of the website About Social Anxiety.
How to Stop Hating Yourself When You Have a Mental Health Relapse
- Many are ashamed even of having self-hatred.
- Third, I express my feelings in ways which feel natural to me.
- A vital board on this path for many is self-forgiveness.
- Maybe it’s time to stop internalizing the opinion of the people who hurt you most, and look elsewhere for feedback.
- Egan, S. J., Rees, C. S., Delalande, J., Greene, D., Fitzallen, G., Brown, S., & Finlay-Jones, A.
- The guilt I carried for not telling anyone the thoughts I had and for allowing myself to get so bad again.
Just like every addiction story is different, so is the path to recovery. Some treatment providers and facilities offer aftercare services as part of the original treatment plan, or free counseling for a period following the initial treatment time. Relapse triggers aren’t limited to places, people, or events.
Find Support
The 24/7 hotline will connect you with mental health resources in your area. Trained specialists can also help you find your state’s resources for treatment if you don’t have health insurance. Jennifer Gerlach, LCSW, is a psychotherapist based in Southern Illinois who specializes in psychosis, mood what to do after a relapse disorders, and young adult mental health. Egan, S. J., Rees, C. S., Delalande, J., Greene, D., Fitzallen, G., Brown, S., & Finlay-Jones, A. A review of self-compassion as an active ingredient in the prevention and treatment of anxiety and depression in young people. Administration and Policy in Mental Health and Mental Health Services Research, 1-19.